"The Private and the Cook," by Frank Eisenberg


"The Private and the Cook," by Frank Eisenberg


"The Private and the Cook," by Frank Eisenberg has a Private praising a meal that the Cook served. In the end the Private criticizes the Cook's coffee at which the cook falls over dead. The moral of the story is don't expect strong coffee and to be satisfied with the meal.


Frank Eisenberg


Upper Midwest Jewish Artchives: Archives and Special Collections in the University of Minnesota Archives.
Box 449, File 17.






"The Private and the Cook", by Frank Eisenberg

One day a Private said to the Cook, “That slum we had today was the finest mulligan I ever tasted, but positively. And not only that, the stewed tomatoes were marvelous, something about them that was different, and the biscuits, say, I don’t know, Cook but honest they're from out of this world. Never did I eat such biscuits. And, the bread pudding, in my whole life never did I taste such pudding. In fact the whole meal was wonderful. And, the coffee, boy, it was swell, maybe a little weak, but after all, it was a week day anyway, so I didn’t mind much. I tell you Cook I think our outfit has the best meals in the whole goddam Army.

Whereupon the Cook Expired.

The moral is don’t expect strong coffee. Be satisfied with a good meal.

Submitted by
Frank Eisenberg,
Universal Pictures,
1019 Currie Ave.,
Minneapolis, Minn.

Original Format

8 x 11 sheet of paper


the private and the cook .JPG
Date Added
December 4, 2013
Creative Pieces Written by Frank and Art Eisenberg
Item Type
, , , ,
Frank Eisenberg, “"The Private and the Cook," by Frank Eisenberg,” Discovering the Importance in the Ordinary:, accessed December 8, 2019, https://eisenbergexhibit.omeka.net/items/show/47.